Alzheimer Care or Con?

My brother-in-law has been diagnosed with this awful disease just recently, and the care that he receives, or doesn't, disgusts me! The staff appear to mess with his medication almost on a daily basis to keep him quiet, but when questioned in depth the truth is that he has been drugged because he got lucky and pushed somebody over in the care home - and is now seen as 'violent'. It doesn't matter that the other in-patient has the opportunity to wander around the establishment creating havoc, including entering his private room, his bedroom and taking everything that she can lay her hands on (she doesn't get drugged incidentally) stealing his drinks and chocolates etc. He retaliates I suspect in the only miserable way that he can, by bearly being able to lift his arms; yet he pushed, or caught the in-mate off balance who fell over and is now deemed the troublemaker! We visit him and he bearly opens his eye, he has been drugged again! His finger nails are filthy dirty where he has been scratching at himself (I'm sure I don't have to spell this out!). His clothes are a miss-match and certainly not his own. His face flannel disappeared, his underwear (when he wears it that is) is dirty and not his own, digital hearing-aids are lost, put in with the wash, yes in the washing machine! This dispicable list of trauma goes on and on and on.....

The care homes are charging an unbeleivable £1,000 per week or more, per person, to look after our loved ones so why should we have to put up with this nonsense? More to the point, why should our loved ones have to put up with it? How much does it really cost us or the NHS to fund? No wonder new care homes are being built at a rapid rate and several stories high!

I began putting some figures together which are too lengthy to list here, but how can a care home warrant £1,000 per week when the staff get paid the pittance that they do? Most are unable to speak much English! Our loved ones eat next to nothing because they are rarely helped with their food! So what happens, they die of malnutrition, pneumonia or similar! They go to bed early so no care needed after that, other than for somebody to be on hand during the night.

We take in food because the scraps offered from the day before are still on a table in the room where the temperature has dried them to a crisp. Frankly we wouldn't treat our animals like this, so why our loved ones? I could go on for an age yet, but it will not help my brother-in-law! However, what will help him is Ron getting on his soapbox in an attempt to encourage my sister to make a stand!! This really is a disgrace in our lifetime that has got to stop.......remember it could be any one of us tomorrow!!

Hi Ron:  Does the family have to option of moving him to another facility?

Ron,(hello)

It is as terrible here in the states as well.

It is always in the news about mistreatment,theivery,the list goes on and on,my grandfather had it ,he died in 2005 at 92,though,we were lucky as a family to have him in his own home with in home care,he died there,peacefully,that is what i think most of us would want,yet so many don't.There is talk of tougher lesgislation on this subject,yet it still goes on.

I wonder what home he is in Ron (We looked at The Triangle but WAY too pricey). We ended up in The Close in Burford, it's OK as far as homes go, and luckily 'Dad' doesn't have Alzheimer's and can speak his own mind (and often does).

My friend's father-in-law has Alzheimer's and was also sedated because he 'attacked' someone. They found out that he had been constantly provoked, but that didn't matter, they still put him on the drugs to subdue him.

Also my friend threatened to move him to a less expensive care home, and was given a lower price (£800.00 I think) to keep him there, so you might want to try that, if of course you want him kept there.

The Close also has a large amount of almost non- speaking staff, but 'Dad' is quite happy for the most part with them.

I hope things get better for you brother-in-law (care wise), it's hard to see them suffer and not be able to do anything about it.

My mum also had Alzheimer's, but we were able to care for her at home though it was a trial.

I'm really sorry about the situation, Ron.  Just what you need right now, more stress!  I hope it all works out.